First, make P1 choose the character you both want to be. Then unselect the character and move off of it. Move P2 over, and select the character. Go back one screen, then go into the character select again. You should both be on the same character. Both of you select the character. Do whatever you want from there on.
Note: In the character select screen and options, whenever one of you does an animation, both of you will. Also, if P2 chooses a different kind of vehicle than P1, P1 will look strange. Don't worry, this won't actually happen in the game.
I haven't tested this with P3 or P4 yet, but in theory, it should work.